Relationship Garden Goals

May is the beginning of new things in Northern states. Some beleagued flowers have already come and gone because they are too Impatient to wait. Others, like tulips or daffodils are now opening up. Gardeners will begin planting their seeds & plants. My 8 x 10 bed is cleaned out and waiting. I cleaned up the bed a couple of weeks ago when it was warm and nice outside. I threw away the garbage that the wind had blown into my backyard. I had purchased some new dirt, both top & garden soils to spread out on the surface. I also fertilized it with all the rabbit poo I was able to find. My garden will succeed if four things occur:

1. It receives care and attention. Water, weed pulling and pruning are important. It has a good foundation of fertilizer and good dirt. 
2. I have to climb a ladder, cut down the weed tree impediments in my yard & the ones next door so my garden receives vital sunlight.
3. I keep the pests out of it. I'm going to try the neem oil this year and see if it helps. I don't want to go chemical pesticide but I also don't like putting in a bunch of effort only for the bugs to have a party. 
4. Jehovah makes it grow. Can't do it without His energy. 

In considering what makes a garden grow, I can't help but draw similarities between relationships. I reached out to a couple of the last males with whom I had what I want to consider a connection at one time. Why? I guess because I am not dating anyone now and I feel I need attention. Again, I. Yet, when I consider them both as former partners, they do not stand up to the same requirements that I have set for the garden.

For instance, neither one of them came with a good foundation for a relationship. Neither one had good prior experience with women. Neither had I good prior experiences so it was a lose-lose. Lies were being told from day one. Mr. T, lied constantly about his interest in me. Constantly keep me thinking that there was something there if I would just be patient. It never happened no matter how long I waited. Mr. K was in a homeless shelter due to losing pretty much everything he had. Then, the little he had, a low wage job, was almost lost due to a drug addiction.

I was always "climbing the ladder" so to speak. I did more in the relationships than I was supposed to both as a female and as a 50/50 interest holder. They did little if anything. Maybe just enough to keep me hoping and engaged. Hoping that something stable would eventually happen but you can't grow stability. It has to be there. It has to be created from day one and then it takes shape. It usually has to begin from the beginning, if that makes sense. You can't go back and reform an already planted garden because you will kill or damage the roots causing lackluster growth.

There were other "pests" that were in the relationship garden. Satan was one. Now don't get me wrong, he can't be blamed for everything, I mean he can but we often allow him in to gum up the works so to speak.  Yet, when you are dealing with people who do not have the same respect that you do for Jehovah, well, there's only one other choice left. "Never allow place for the devil." Yet, if you are attempting to date someone who does not feel the way you do about Jehovah, you have allowed the devil in your garden. He is a pest. He will not let things grow. He will poison whatever you are attempting to grow because its his job.

Finally, as the last paragraph indicated, I was foolish to think that I could have dealings with anyone that does not rely on my heavenly father. All in all, it was doomed for failure. I accept that and reaching back to either one of them is like trying to save the plants from last year. They are dead and gone and shouldn't be considered for anything but waste. They served as a learning experience and they can be used as natural fertilizer that a natural garden like mine needs. So I won't contact any of the formers anymore. No, May is a time for new things. Better things. I can do better. I will move forward, learn from the past and let it stay in the past. I know that even if no one ever contacts me again, if I never go on another date again, if I never have anyone kiss me or hold me or anything, Jehovah is my God. He loves me and only wants the best. If I am unlike those cute little Inpatients and just wait for Him, he will bless my garden in whatever way He chooses. I trust Him to do that for me.